Week 9 Rewind! (I missed the preview...)

I knkow y'all were heart broken, but sadly I missed a preview of games this weekend.  I have no excuse folks,  I just flat out didn't write one.  I thought I would write one Thursday night, but I chose to rip Frank McCourt instead.  I thought it was appropriate due to his claim that a victim beaten within an inch of his life at his stadium, was at fault.  I figured I'd write one Friday night instead...yeah I jsut got lazy and didn't write one.  With that in mind, I will write a rewind of the SEC weekend!  Here we go...



(This is a real movie, I promise you.  See what I did here?)

Arkansas @ Uncle Ned:  God this was gut wrenching.  Uncle Ned came out (of a silly inflatable tube tunnel thingy) and played inspired.  Aaron's little brother Jordan played very well, running and passing the Commodores to a 28-20 second half lead.  Then...disaster struck.  Running Back Zac Stacy (two first names??) fumbled, untouched at the Arkansas 4 yard line.  Naturally it bounced right to a Razorback linebacker, who ran 96 yards (escorted by two teammates for good measure) for a touchdown.  THEN, Vandy drives 80 somethin yards for a game tying 27 yard field goal with :08 left.  Aaaaaaand the kicker missed it.  (Insert facepalm).  Here's to hopin Vandy can grab two more wins and go to a bowl game.

Georgia @ Florida:  Wow thanks Gators, really could've helped us out by winning this one.  I mean really could've helped us.  But that's fine, ya know what that's fine.  Also while we're at it, can we stop with the charade that this game isn't called the World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party.  Attention administrators of both schools; jsut because you don't call it the World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party, doesn't mean people aren't going to drink.  It's the same thing as not calling the Oklahoma/Texas game the "Red River Shootout" anymore.  Yeah cause everyone knows if you call it that, people will jsut start randomly shooting each other.  Anyway back to the Cocktail Party, John Brantley's first game back improved the offense, but it still wasn't enough.  Hey, anyone hear people calling for Richt to be fired?  Haven't heard from those folks in awhile.

Aunt Kathy @ Auburn:  The Rebels hung tough for a half.  And then they remembered, "Oh yeah, we're not that good."  I gotta root for Auburn next week now.  Please, please, please, beat Georgia in "The South's Oldest Rivalry."  I get the distinct feeling, the Gamecocks are gonna need that extra loss to win the division.  (More on that in this week's preview).  Just remember Rebel fans, four more weeks and your season is over.  Well, unless you win out and then can go to a bowl ga...haha nevermind I couldn't finish that sentence.

Mississippi State @ Herp Derp Nation:  I'm gonna be honest, I didn't even know this game was being played.  No idea what to say about it.  The Bulldogs won (against another generic mascot) so I guess that's good for Dan Mullen...not so good for Joker Phillips.  If you know anything about this game, please contact your local ESPN affiliate, otherwise this game will dissapear from the history books for all time.

South Carolina @ Tennessee:  Whew, thank god that one's over.  It's a little concerning that our offense has been pretty bad the last two weeks but hey at least we won.  As expected, Brandon Wilds had a good game, which was encouraging.  Also, I know I couldn't have been the only person to scream some variation of "What the hell are we doin?!?!?!" when we went for it on 4th and 1 down by 3 instead of kicking the field goal...only to then immediately jump up and say "Good Call!!" when Rory Anderson hauled in the go ahead touchdown.  For Tennessee, good call burning the redshirt of your "Quarterback of the Future"  only to pull him from the game the next week.  Seriously, good call Derek Dooley.  You pulled him for Matt Simms, who you clearly think is terrible or you wouldn't have inserted Worley last week.  But I guess we shouldn't expect anything less from a guy who dresses like this:



(Three month waiting list for these pants folks...three months)

I'll be back with a preview this week!  So everyone can rest easy this week (I know everyone's been worried) your favorite SEC/Sun Belt/Service Academy preview will return for week 10!!

-Major Munnerlyn



New Feature: Top 5 List!!

So I've been waiting to do this for awhile here on The Bagmen.  I've had several ideas for these lists, but tonight I saw something on ESPN that was the final impetus for actually doing it.  This will be the first in a series of (semi) weekly Top 5 Lists.  I saw a disturbing item about Dodgers "Owner" Frank McCourt.  I won't tell ya here (mainly cause I want you to scroll down to the bottom of the list) but read all five reasons and you'll know what I'm talkin about.  Without further ado, I present to you (hey that rhymed):

(Come onnnnn, you can trust me!!)

Top 5 Reasons Frank McCourt Is Terrible

5).  Not Having Enough Money:  Look, I'm no financial wizard.  I will freely admit that most of what goes on in the world of finances is above my head.  But it seems that one basic thing must be present in all transactions in a capitalist country; THE PURCHASER MUST HAVE ENOUGH FREAKIN MONEY TO EXECUTE THE TRANSACTION!!!  Baseball, led by the great Commish himself, Bud Selig, decided that this little issue could be overlooked when it came to the sale of the Dodgers.  See, ole Franky and his wife didn't actually have enough capital to back up their purchase.  So they just borrowed more money than they should have and that subsequently led them down the road to where the franchsie is today: an embarassment.

4).  Marriage Infidelity:  Call me old school, but I always thought when one gets married, that's kind of it.  You marry the person for a reason.  Well, Frank and his wife, evidently don't really by into that.  Frank subscried to the "I make more money than you so rules don't apply to me" school of thought.  Frank fired his wife for having an affair with a Dodgers employee.  Gosh the horror, your wife cheats on you with one of your employees!!!  How dare she, she deserved to be fired.  What's that?  Frank cheated on her with a Dodgers employee too??  Oh, well...that's different.  Just trust me, it is.  Totally different...

3).  Leveraging The Team:  Remember reason number 5?  Really, you don't?  Jesus what was that like 8 seconds ago you read that?  Basically the McCourts didn't have enough money.  How does someone get around a lack of money and still live a lavish lifestyle?  EASY!  Just borrow an enormous amount of money from your baseball team duh!!!!  Approximately $180 million was stolen borrowed from the Los Angeles Dodgers.  This was to support like 6 houses, ridiculous vacations, and salaries in the $400,000 range for his two sons.  And that's just to name a few of the over the top personal expenses.

2).  Lack of Pride:  Seriously, you are the owner of the Dodgers for goodness' sakes!  One of the most historic franchises in sports history, not just baseball.  They are the reason for western expansion in Major League Baseball.  And this guy has allwoed them to become an embarassment.  The farm system has been depleted, they are no longer competitive, they gave a boatload of money to an overrated Manny Ramirez, had to borrow money multiple times to make payroll, and have operated the team as if he doesn't care about results.  Which, quite honestly, I don't think he does.

1).  Suing An Assault Victim:  Yep, you read that correctly.  I can kinda forgive all the other nonsense that has gone on under Frank McCourt in seven years of ownership.  Well, at least compared to this one.  This is what I saw on ESPN today.  Frank McCourt has filed a countersuit in response to the suit filed by the family of Bryan Stow.  If you don't know who that is, Bryan Stow is the San Francisco Giants fan who as brutally asaulted following opening day this year.  Stow was beaten so badly, that he has STILL not recovered from his injuries and been released from the hospital.  Folks the assault happened in March...March.  He was literally beaten to within an inch of his life, due to lack of crowd control, police presence and safety/lighting in the parking lot.  To sum it up, the Dodgers did not do enough to prevent situations like this happening.  NOW, McCourt counter sued Bryan Stow alleging that he was partially to blame...for his own beating.  Just let that marinate for a few minutes...

And to think, Bud Selig didn't want Mark Cuban to buy the Dodgers (or the Cubs for that matter) because he thought Cuban would embarass MLB because he is outspoken.  Yeah that seems to have worked out well for everyone huh?

-Major Munnerlyn



 

Week 8 SEC Picks!! (Aaaand Air Force and Louisiana-Delhomme)

(General Pickett.  See what I did there?  Ok it was a stretch I know)

You wanna know why week 8 sucks?  Cause its freakin week 8...grunt!  With that in mind, here we go with the picks:

Jacksonville St @ Herp Derp Nation:  Absolutely no one is paying attention to this game.  I'm pretty sure Mrs. Boss won't even be watching this one...and she's the biggest Herp Derp fan there is.  Ok, she might watch it.  Other than that, I have no interest in writing about this game.  Other than to say, as terrible as the Herp Derps are, surely they can't lose this game.  OUR PICK:  Herp Derp
Also a friendly reminder:

Arkansas @ Aunt Kathy:  Folks, the only good thing about Aunt Kathy's season is that with each week, the season is almost over.  Houston Nutt is that much closer to being fired and they can re-hire David Cutcliffe.  Ok I was kidding about that last part.  Cutcliffe made too much sense there, that's obviously why they got rid of him.  Now ordinarly I don't root for coaches to be fired.  I've seen in person how much it affects the assistanat coaches, supoort staff, and more importantly how it affects their families.  With all that said, he is probably not what they're lookin for.  Arkansas is a far superior team.  OUR PICK:  Arkansas

Auburn @ LSU:  More Tiger on Tiger crime, that's all dis is.  If Auburn wins this game I will stop hatin on them.  Seriously, I will buy into whatever witch doctor, voodoo, soul selling that Gene Chizik and company have undertaken.  I don't see them doin it though.  LSU's defense is better than Auburn's offense, especially an offense under the direction of a first time starting QB...on the road.  I know LSU's best defender is suspended (along with their starting RB and their starting CB) but I think they can overcome that.  The deepest part (that's what she...said...??) of the nation's deepest defense is their secondary.  They should be able to handle the personnel losses.  Now for college football fans everywhere; let's hope LSU gets out of this game scot free so this year's "Game of the Century" vs Alabama.  No one wants either of those teams to be at less than full strength in two weeks.  OUR PICK:  LSU

Army @ Uncle Ned:  This is a tough game for me to pick.  Everyone knows my affinity for the service academies.  But at the same time, who doesn't love the Uncle Ned Commodores going to a bowl game storyline??  This would represent victory number 4 for the 'Dores (hey that rhymed) on their quest to six.  Army doesn't even have the advantage of being the intellectually superior team.  Usually this leads to undisciplined defensive players being shredded by the Black Knight's wishbone offense.  I think Uncle Ned is going to pull this one out, but I wouldn't be surprised if Army wins it.  OUR PICK:  Uncle Ned

Tennessee @ Alabama:  Another of the south's great rivalries.  The annual "Third Saturday in October" game.  There will be plenty more of these to come as long as greedy college presidents and Missouri don't ruin it for everyone.  But that's in the future (just ask Nick Saban, well, on second thought don't ask him.  He got pissed at the press conference this week).  Just like last week, UT would've struggled even with all their offensive personnel on hand.  Aaaaand also just like last week, they will definitely struggle without their two best offensive players.  Alabama is just too good folks.  And just like the LSU/Auburn game; let's all hope that the Tide make it out of this game completely healthy.  OUR PICK:  Alabama

Sun Belt Conference Game of the Week, Presented by the South Florida High School Sports Show:  Louisiana-Delhomme @ Western Kentucky:  Louisiana-Delhomme is the surprise team in the country.  Folks, this was a fairly invisible program until this year.  They hire the Mississippi State Wide Recievers coach as their head guy and BAM, the Cajuns are bowl eligible!  That's how they roll, dog!  They have separated themselves, along with Arkansas St, as the leaders in the Sun Belt.  And they are in the driver's seat for that prestigious New Orleans Bowl bid that everyone is clamoring for.  Can you imagine the Mercedes-Benz Superdome (get used to it, that's the new name...seriously) if the local Ragin' Cajuns are in the game?  Gotta be at least 24,000 people at that game!  Western Kentucky, what can I say?  I mean thanks for giving berth to Herp Derp Nation I guess, right??  OUR PICK:  Louisiana-Delhomme

Service Academy Game of the Week, Presented by Capt. Richard Harr; Air Force @ Boise State:  This is gonna be a pretty good game I think.  Air Force can play some defense when they want to, forget the Notre Dame game, and Boise State can play offense even when they don't want to.  The only thing that makes this game better??  Thinking about it in its proper context; a potential future Big East matchup...seriously.  That was gross just to type that.  Do what's right, stay in the Mountain West!  OUR PICK:  Boise State

-Major Munnerlyn

ACC WEEK 8 (DAMN IT'S WEEK 8 ALREADY) PICKS! HORRIBLE CARNAGE AND TRAINWRECKS INSIDE!

YAYYY! ITS TDIME FO DA A C C PIX OFFTH DA WEEK!! (insert monster noises/grunts/all around sounds of displeasure)

North Carolina @ Clemson
Clemson, S.C.
12:00 PM TV: ESPN  

• First and foremost…this write-up is coming from a Carolina fan on a bye week, whom still has a bad taste in his mouth from the Derp that was the Terps this past Saturday night. You are up 18, at home, to a Clemson team that you can beat. Could you tackle? Maybe double a few WR’s? GOOD GOD. I’m still on the fence about the Tigers, but the more I watch I am starting to think they have plenty of raw talent and catching back up to the Gamecocks talent wise. Boyd seems to be doing better than what was expected at QB, so I can’t say anything other than he’s exceeded expectations. UNC has been an up and down team from what I have gathered. Hell, they couldn’t even beat a Louisville team in Chapel Hill by more than 10. That’s LOUISVILLE. It seems that Clemson is just waiting for someone to beat them, and the Tar Holes have a little bit of confidence. I’m hoping that they can be the team that brings the “Mighty Tiiiiigs” back down to earth because we all know there is only one thing worse than an undefeated Clemson team…and that’s full blown AIDS.  Pick: Clemson (but take UNC and the points)

Wake Forest @ Duke
Durham, N.C.
12:30 PM TV: ACC Network

• DON’T SLEEP ON THE DEAMON DEACONS! Just ask Florida State…who thought it would be easy to stroll into Winston-Salem and take a win. Fortunately for everyone keeping score at home, we won’t have to worry about that as Dook has the honor of taking the bus ride down I-85/40. (See what I did there? KEEPING IT LOCAL PEOPLE!) There is not a single part of this game that says “WATCH ME”, but I’m sure I’ll have to just check in to see who shits the bed first. Pick: Wake

Boston College @ Virginia Tech
Blacksburg, Va.
3:00 PM TV: RSN

• God, please…just make it stop. I can’t justify this Boston College team. Pick: Virginia Tech

NC State @ Virginia
Charlottesville, Va.
3:30 PM TV: ESPNU

• All those who had Virginia beating Georgia Tech last week please step forward. DON’T YOU DARE WALK FORWARD BECAUSE YOU LIE. What a week it was for those in HooTown, USA. There weren’t enough Clorox bleach pens in Charlottesville to get all the red wine stains out of everyone’s clothes after the post-game celebration. WINE AND CHEESE FOR EVERYONE! EVEN YOU TINY TIM! NC State on the other hand has really been kicking themselves in the ass this year…well wait…TOM O’LEARY has been kicking his self in the ass this year. Was it really a good idea to tell Russell Wilson “Hey, either its all football or you are out”? Yea, brilliant there chief. Don’t look for this to be another W for the Wahoos…but at this point, who really cares? Pick: NC State

Maryland @ Florida State
Tallahassee, Fla.
3:30 PM TV: ABC/ESPN2

• All those in favor of just acting like Florida State wasn’t preseason top 10 say AYE. (Resounding cheer from the northern Florida area) I know, you’ve had your injuries…and you played some tough teams…(Clemson…Wake?) but what’s happened is inexcusable. Is it too late to resurrect Bobby Bowden? Maryland…I’m shaking my head at you. What in the hell did you do last week? The ONE chance you had to remain relevant in the ACC was blown. You even brought out some more super cool uniforms! Chevy Chase Field was packed at 48,000 people going crazy! (Insert laugh about stadium size/penis size) At this point, I’d just pack it in and quit your football program and concentrate on getting Gary Williams back because you couldn’t even do the one thing that most teams can handle: WIN after having an 18 point lead in the second half.

Georgia Tech @ Miami

Miami Gardens, Fla.
3:30 PM TV: ESPN

• Did they really think that by adding “Gardens” to Miami Gardens was going to spruce the place up a little? It’s still dumpy Miami and Joe Robbie Stadium if you ask me. The bet within the bet for this game will be total attendance…over/under 32,100. My heart says over, but brain says under. Georgia Teach decided to derp it up last week apparently because they were tired of being undefeated. Who knew that it was such a tough chore? Miami is easy the biggest enigma in the ACC because you never know what team will take the field. From hence forth, Miami will be called The Forrest Gump Box Of Chocolates (or TFGBOC for short) for obvious reasons. All I need is someone to Photoshop Randy Shannon’s face on Sally Field’s body to play the mom, and Nevin Shapiro to play Lt. Dan. Pick: Georgia Tech

This is Why We Make Fun of the Big Ten...ish

(Yep, we completed this many passes last week...and STILL won!!)

Alright I know it was last week but I had to bring this to everyone's attention.  Some of you may wonder why we are such overt SEC snobs.  Why we constantly bang on other conferences and reference their inferiority.  Some people say, "SEC superiority is just media contrived BS.  They're not really that much better than everyone."  Aaaaaaand just when I start to think, 'Well maybe they're right.  Maybe they're not really that much worse than the SEC,' last week comes along and allows me to TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF!!  Let's set the scene, shall we?? 

THE Ohio State, the conference's premier program, is not really having that good a year.  Pretty inept on offense, not nearly as strong as they usually are on defense, and just overall not the juggernaut they have been recently.  Illinois on the other hand is having one heckuva season.  Undefeated, ranked in the top-15 with an unbelievable offense, and a suffocating defense lead by this guy:

Who is that fella??  That, ladies and gentlemen, is a defensive tackle with one of the nest names in college football; Whitney Mercilus.  Sure his first name is Whitney and that's kinda silly, but his last name is pronouned "merciless."  Awesome, plain and simple.  But I digress.  Back to the game:  The Buckeyes traveled to Champaign to take on the Illini.  The game kicked off, Ohio State completed 1 pass, and three hourse later, got on the bus with a victory.  Let me repeat that, to make it clear.  A team that was under .500, went on the road, completed all of 1 pass attempt, and beat an undefeated Illinois team.  An Illinois team that I had listed as a team that was "So Close" to a fictional playoff berth.  So next time you wonder if we are being too harsh on other conferences, or you think it's really not necessary to be that snobbish towards other conferences, remember this stat line:

Ohio State Passing
	C/ATT	YDS	AVG	TD	INT
B. Miller	1/4	17	4.3	1	0
Team	1/4	17	4.3	1	0

I rest my case.

-Major Munnerlyn



So it's been awhile...BUT THAT'S OK!

Today is the first time in upwards of a week and a half that I have the time to update the ol’ blog. It’s been a busy few weeks, as we have had shows at my place of employment AS WELL AS a road trip to Starkville, MS. More on that later…

Is it just me or are you pissed that it’s already halfway through football season. I can’t believe that we already have Tennessee playing Alabama…and that Florida has lost three straight. Nothing makes me happier than this time of year! We haven’t run the air in what amounts to be about 2 weeks, and have had the windows open the entire time. I SAY I SAY…IT’S GOOD TO HAVE LAND.

Today marks my first day of moving into my own, brand new office. It’s not too bad, about 8 x 10, had a door and it’s my OWN personal space. Who would complain about that? Now, maybe I can get a few people to come say hello and “spend some time in my office”. MOVIN’ ON UP!

So that whole Starkville trip…

It started with a wakeup call about 5:30 and heading out the door at 6AM. It’s a relatively short 2.5 hour drive over to the promised land of Mississippi, and the Ms. Boss was more excited than I could believe. Once we finally got into town, traffic nonexistent for 3 HOURS PRIOR TO KICKOFF! I couldn’t believe it. The stadium/campus itself wasn’t too terrible. Very open, very green…just what you would expect from an agricultural school. Even the fans were friendly…and even joked about how annoying the “COWBELLS” are. (Again, more on this later). We finally get to park about 1/3 mile from the seats, and would you guess it? 2 MSU fans having a cup of coffee and reading The Wall Street Journal. BIZZARO WORLD. 

After doing due diligence on taking down a bottle of Piggly Wiggly’s finest champagne and OJ, we turned our attention to cold Natty Light around 10AM or so. It felt so right, so early…it was college all over again…with the exception of being in enemy territory. The walk to the stadium was very quiet, very low key. No partiers, no cheering…just waddling to the stadium. Now, I made the comment on the ol Facebook feed that “if you want an ACC experience and don’t want to leave the comfort of your SEC state…Davis-Wade stadium is for you!”. I couldn’t have been more right. This place was a joke. It was so bad, Clemson may (I REPEAT MAY) be better. 10 minutes before kickoff, you got the token, “WHO LET THE DOGS OUT” song. The Bulldogs come out to Will Farrell’s skit “WE NEED MORE COWBELL”. Then, you get techno music from some random European trash spinning in the background. Right before kickoff you get the “MAROON” and “WHITE” cheer, which…I’m all for fan support and cheers but 2 syllables makes it very difficult to keep up with. NEED I NOT FORGET TO MENTION that the East upper was white shirts, lower was maroon. West upper was maroon, lower was white. Carolina can’t even coordinate a shade of garnet…so for this, I give MSU and their fans an A+. They sure as hell can work up them tin cans and telegraph lines to make pretty things happen!

During the game, it was an unexpected back and forth battle. Normally, if this was an SEC stadium, you would have been able to cut the tension with a knife. You’d have fans cheering and going crazy at every opportunity. This wasn’t the case at ol’ Davis-Wade. I kid you not, Connor Shaw was taking snaps on the 25 and I could hear him. Just unreal. Maybe it was the fact that they wanted to play “guess which car wins the race” during timeouts. Or, it could be “pick the Bulldog who has a treat in his mouth”. Or, it could be the great in game advertisements about catfish ponds or Dan Mullen inviting you on down to Richard’s bar after the game. For 3.5 hours, I felt like I was at a hokey, wacky, jump the shark ACC game. It was like football wasn’t the reason why you were there. There was never a sense of urgency or “Get Loud!”. Even with the cowbells, I was expecting a little more intimidating atmosphere. Nothing. Nada. Zip. I guess it’s just how things are down on the farm, and I’m sure that the 11:22 kickoff had something to do with it too. It just didn’t have the feel of big time football. Maybe this is what it would have been like to go to school at UNC or NCSU…or (insert any other ACC school).

Now, on to the most important issue that has been bugging the t-total shit out of me since Saturday. I’m not going to bash Carolina fans..but either we have some of the DUMBEST fans in the world…or simply put 80% of people have little to no concept on how the game of football is played. Let me entertain you with some examples from Saturday:

A – Holding. As a former offensive lineman, holding happens on every play. 9 times out of 10, you don’t get caught. It’s also understood by the majority of people who understand football that it happens too. HOWEVER, many loud, obnoxious middle aged women have no idea what holding is, or how it should be called on the field. Just because an offensive lineman is doing is job and standing up a defensive player, keeping him from getting to the QB is NOT HOLDING. When an offensive lineman has a defensive player turned sideways when their QB takes off to scramble; THAT IS NOT HOLDING. STOP YELLING “HE’S HOLDING REF! HOLDING!” Ugh. Nothing makes me want to bang my head into the concrete faster than this. If you see Offensive linemen grabbing jersey, that’s a hold. If you see an offensive lineman’s hand’s outside of the other team’s shoulders while blocking…it’s usually holding. Remember, there is 2 refs looking at the line for holding, and I’m sorry…sometimes it doesn’t get called. It is subjective, but hopefully this post will educate you enough to not annoy the piss out of everyone at the game around you.

B- Running outside the tackles with a RB build for the inside zone. Now again, this post is not too relevant with Lattimore on the bench, but it could be enough to pull your head out of your ass and say “I can be smart and understand which running backs work…and where”. In this case, middle aged woman was going crazy because “WE CAN’T RUN IT UP THE MIDDLE” and “WE NEED TO RUN IT OUTSIDE NOW WITH LATTIMORE”. There are a few things wrong with this statement. First, if they are stacking the box (the area where the LB and DL play) with 7 or more players, you aren’t going to be able to successfully run it to the outside. Generally, this is accomplished with 4 down lineman, and 3 to 4 LB’s playing behind them securing the corner or dropping back into a read/zone. If you aren’t going to make it up the middle, off to the side is not easy either. Secondly, Lattimore…if you haven’t noticed…is not/was not an outside the tackle running back. Our offense is based off of a little thing called the INSIDE ZONE. We aren’t a team with tons of speed on the outside to run sweeps.  

C – Running the Option inside of the 10 yard line on your game winning drive: This was unacceptable. A grown ass man yelled out no 1^st and Goal from the 8 to “RUN THE OPTION”. Let’s look at the situation. First, we had a freshman at RB. Secondly, why would we pitch the ball and run the risk of a fumble? (See Georgia/Andrew Pinnock) Third, we aren’t even an option team. All of this made zero sense.

D – Taking an intentional safety to win the game: My goodness…you would have thought that we were going to be solving all of the world’s problems during the final 4 seconds. I heard everything from “run around and don’t get tackled” to punting the ball. Yea, let’s punt the ball out of our end zone and run the risk of a block recovered for a TD…or even a kick returned! It was simple…take the safety and end the game. Get out of Starkville with the W. (Editor’s note: I understand those that yelled anything other than SAFTEY likely had Carolina -3.5 or -4…resulting in a loss)

Again, I’m not saying that I am not everything in the game of football…but just please pay attention in the future.

 -Gamblin Boss

Carolina Fans, The Sky is Not Falling...



(Shut up Chicken Little, just shut up!!)

Alright Gamecock fans, I know this has been a pretty crappy two week stretch.  We lost to an Auburn team that, let's be honest, we clearly could have beaten.  We lost our 5th year senior starting QB because he has an alcohol problem.  We had to waste our time with Herp Derp nation.  The Other School in South Carolina continues to be a pretty good team in a conference full of extremely mediocre teams.  And now, we lose our workhorse running back, the pride of our program to a knee injury.  Isn't it typical Gamecock football history though?  To have what could potentially be the best season in team history lined up, and not only is tOSiSC having what could be their greatest season ever, but our season could be potentially undone because our 5th yr QB is a drunk and our stud is injured BLOCKING!!  I mean honestly, at the beginning of the year if someone said, "Hey y'all, your season could potentially be derailed this year."  Wouldn't we all have guessed it would be something out of the ordinary like this?  We have a drunk for a QB and our best player goes down blocking in Starkville, Mississippi.  But you know what, GET OVER IT!!  We are on the cusp of big boy football.  Big boy football means you have depth.  Big boy football means you overcome.  I can understand the trepidation (it means fear or alarm...I had to look it up too) because overcoming odds and playing tough has never been "The Garnet Way."  (Editor's Note:  I hate that campaign slogan USC, come up with somethiin else, seriously).  But that was before we had Jeffery and Lattimore and Clowney.  That is to say; before we had big boy football players.  Lattimore will rehab.  He will work hard.  The running game will rally around Brandon Wilds.  For those who are unaware, this is Brandon Wilds:

He is from Blythewood, South Carolina and evidently was the first player in his high school's history to rush for over 1,000 yards in a season.  I know what you're thinking, this is a guy who was 5th on the depth chart when the season started and was destined for a redshirt.  Well ya know what?  It ain't the start of the season anymore.  He ain't destined for a redshirt anymore.  And, more importantly, he has played well and runs hard.  Would I rather have #21?  Absolutely, my feelings about him have been made clear on this blog.  But you know what, we don't have him.  Next man up.  Rally around this team and we will be fine.  And if you don't believe me, read this article by Chris Low on espn.com.  Maybe he can convince you.

-Major Munnerlyn







Week 7 SEC Picks!!!!! (Aaaaaaand FIU and Navy)



(Picks!!  See what I did here??)

South Carolina @ Mississippi State: Well good lord, anything happen in Columbia this week? No? Yeah I hadn't heard about anything either! Tomorrow, Carolina will end what was very probably the most interesting week in team history. Or at least since Steve Tanneyhill left campus. The dismissal of a 5^th year starting quarterback (a long time coming in this man's humble opinion) and the head coach locking out a sports reporter, what else could possibly have happened?? No...say it aint say so!! A 4^th string defensive tackle (Byron Jerideau) switched to offense to provide interior offensive line depth?? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! The question now is will the Gamecocks be able to overcome all the drama and play well enough to get a road win? Honestly, and it pains me to say this, I don't think so. I think the Bulldogs will get up for this game and the Gamecocks will have too much going on in their heads. OUR PICK: Mississippi State...damnit

LSU @ Tennessee: I don't see anyway Tennessee wins this game. Their two best players; QB Tyler Bray and WO Justin Hunter, are out for extended periods of time. LSU has, probably, the nation's best defense. You do the math. Once again, Jarrett Lee isn't all that bad really, but with that squad on the other side of the ball...he really doesn't have to be anything other than “not that bad.” LSU's mission for the rest of the year, or basically until November 5^th, is to just keep everyone healthy. If 6 people on the Tiger's defense go down with injuries in the first quarter, or miss the team plane, Tennessee has a shot. Otherwise...OUR PICK: LSU

Alabama @ Aunt Kathy: How good is Alabama going to be now that Nick Saban isn't doing the “2 QB system just because I can”...system?? Their defense is still ridiculously awesome. Great article in SI last week about the defense, points out that 7 members of that defense could be drafted in the first 2 rounds of the NFL draft. That sounds made up. As for Aunt Kathy? Well, ummm, the season's almost over so that's good right?? Seriously, Ole Miss had no shot, and then 4 of their guys went ahead and got suspended...good work Coach Nutt. OUR PICK: Ole Miss. I'm kidding, I was just seein if you were payin attention. Obviously it's Alabama

Florida @ Auburn: Easily the most interesting game of the week in the conference. I just can't get on board with Auburn...still. I know they beat Carolina, but still. This team just isn't that good. As for Florida, well they're gonna start a true freshman, Jacoby Brissett, on the road again so it could be an uphill battle. I just think Florida has enough to get it done against this bad Auburn defense. I have to assume Brissett won't “pull a Garcia” and throw 412 picks in one game. Althoouuugghhh, it would be more beneficial to Gamecock fans for the Gators to lose. I just don't see it. OUR PICK: Florida

Georgia @ Uncle Ned: Well it appears “Dores Fever” has officially gone the way of Polio in the US and we have figured out a vaccination for it. Anybody that is still infected after this weekend should consult your local physician. Just like we said last week, everyone is rooting for Vandy to do well. Especially Gamecock fans, who would once again benefit from what would be a surprising loss by a major SEC threat. I think the Mark Richt Redemption Tour gets another one. After all, WE NEED MORE DAWGS!!!!  OUR PICK: Georgia

Sun Belt Conference Game of the Week Presented by The South Florida High School Sports Show; FIU @ Arkansas State: This is actually a good game. All kidding aside. Seriously. Dude shut up stop laughing. These are two good teams. FIU got back on the good side of the ledger last week with a tough road win at Akron (alright maybe it's not that tough to win at Akron). I'm still mad at you FIU because you blew a 10 point lead against Dook...at home (they have a track around their field). This could be a Sun Belt bowl bid elimination game depending on how Louisiana-Delhomme does the rest of the year. OUR PICK: FIU

Service Academy Game of the Week, Presented by Captain Richard Harr; Navy @ Rutgers: FUTURE BIG EAST RIVALRY ALERT!!! Oh yeah, it's comin so just accept it. We've all been clamoring for this to happen so don't get mad now!! Who hasn't wanted to see Navy play Uconn, South Florida and Louisville. Or even to think that now Navy could be the 8-4 sacrificial lamb who gets to play a far superior team in a major bowl game! Oh the excitement can not be contained. I don't like Navy right now but I like Rutgers horrendous rushing attack even less. I think the Mids take it. OUR PICK: Navy

-Major Munnerlyn



Week 6 SEC Picks!!! (Aaaand Louisiana Hyphen and Navy)

(See what I did here?)

I'ts actually been a pretty good year for me in the picking games department.  However, last week sucked on multiple accounts.  Not the least of which was the egg that was laid in Columbia by the Gamecocks.  We are all gettin back on the horse this week though!  For those of you that are fans of Coastal Carolina coach David Bennett (and who among us is not?) you will be disappointed this week; I couldn't find a way to incorporate "We need more dawgs!"  I'll get back to work with Mrs. Munnerlyn and try and figure it out for next week!  And away we go...

Mississippi St @ UAB:  Whoever made the Bulldogs schedule needs to be punched in the throat.  We’ve discussed numerous times their inability to play someone not nicknamed the Bulldogs or Tigers for the first five weeks of the season.  Now they are taking their second road trip of the season to an obscure Conference USA program (they played at Memphis in week 1).  I can only imagine they’re doing the old 2-for-1 home game swap with a lesser school but still.  There are 45 schools in the Sun Belt and C-USA and WAC that would love to play at an SEC school and get the payday.  All kidding aside, my biggest concern for this game is whether or not Mr. and Mrs. Gamblin’ Boss will get to check this one out.  They are proud residents of former American Idol great Ruben Studdard’s hometown, and are key parts of the “Spark that ignites the Blaze.”  That being said, they are also a house divided, and will see the Gamecocks and Herp Derp Nation kickoff 21 minutes after this game.  Which game will they pick??  Only time will tell!!  OUR PICK:  Mississippi State

Herp Derp Nation @ South Carolina:  Well I told you last week that if the Gamecocks lost the game against Auburn, I would be no fun to be around.  This was a correct statement.  Miserable game to watch.  HOWEVA,, if people thought that was bad, let us mess around and lose to a team lead by this guy:  

and see what happens.  Connor Shaw will get the start (hoo…ray…??) and hopefully will play better than he did against the vaunted Pirate defense of East Carolina.  Gamecock fans must rally and support this guy, because it has become abundantly clear that old #5 (Garcia…not Gilmore) is probably not the guy to lead us to new heights.  OUR PICK:  South Carolina

Florida @ LSU:  This is always a good game.  But I guess that’s what happens when you get two of the premier teams in the premier conference together.  This year may be slightly different though.  John Brantley is out for the Gators and instead will be replaced by true freshman Jeff Driskell.  While, I have documented my lack of faith in John Brantley to effectively lead an offense, I’m also not sure that a true freshman making his first career start…on the road…versus the John Chavis-lead Tiger defense, is the ideal recipe for success.  That could help out us Gamecock fans though (assuming we don’t stub our toe the rest of the season).  OUR PICK:  LSU

Auburn @ Arkansas:  This is a game between two teams that frustrate the s-word out of South Carolina fans.  It always feels like no matter how good we are supposed to be or how bad either of these teams is supposed to be, they find a way to win.  Anyway, Arkansas should play inspired because this is an elimination game for them.  A loss drops them to 0-2 in the conference and they still have to play LSU.  Conversely, Auburn’s climb back to relevance could suffer a serious blow too with a loss here.  Despite what everyone saw last week, I don’t think Auburn’s defense is very good.  Yeah, that’s not a good thing against Arkansas sooooo yeah it could be a tough week for the Tigers.  OUR PICK:  Arkansas

Uncle Ned @ Alabama:  Ehhhh (insert rubbing forehead).  Listen, Uncle Ned, I’m sorry you have to play this game.  Ummm, I’m gonna have to ask you to not even show up in Tuscaloosa.  It was a great story when you started out 3-0, it really was.  Everyone roots for you to get to 6 wins every year (Editor’s Note:  For as “great” as that douche Jay Cutler supposedly is/was, he never won more than 5 games while in Nashville.  And he had three other NFL players/future Chicago Bears with him) and then we get sad when you don’t get there.  This is not the type of game that will help you get there though.  That’s ok, they have a running clock in college football right?  What’s that?  They don’t?  Hmm.  Yeah don’t go.  OUR PICK:  Alabama

Georgia @ Tennessee:  Look out Derek Dooley’s pants!! 

(Mrs. Munnerlyn DESPERATELY wants me to get a pair of these)

Here comes the Mark Richt resurrection tour!!  This is a good rivalry, to which not enough people pay attention.  The Bulldogs seem to be rounding into form.  I’m still not a huge fan of Mike Bobo as offensive coordinator, but I think they will be good enough in this game.  I don’t really dislike him because of anything he’s done per se, but just mainly due to his terrible last name.  Honestly, try and say it out loud without giggling.  I’ll wait…(insert elevator music)…SEE!!!  Told you!!!  I mean, I laughed just thinking about somewhat else saying it.  This is the only thing that made me giggle more...

OUR PICK:  Georgia

Sun Belt Conference Game of the Week, Presented by The South Florida High School Spots Show; Troy @ Louisiana Hyphen:  This is it, the moment we’ve all been waiting for…the clash of the Sun Belt titans!!  Control of the Sun Belt (and, perhaps the entire world) is at stake in this game.  The hearts and minds of obscure football fans everywhere is also at stake.  Maybe they’ll hand out a trophy…if we are lucky.  The Fightin’ Jake Delhomme’s are having a potentially historic season.  One that could get them back to a bowl for the first time in, well, probably like 45 years or somethin.  Troy will probably recover, cause it’s Troy and they always seem to be the best team In the conference.  BUT STILL!!  This could be for control of the universe!!  OUR PICK:  Louisiana Hyphen

Service Academy Game of the Week, Presented by Capt. Richard Harr (USAF);  Southern Mississippi @ Navy:  I was tempted to go with Air Force at Notre Dame, because that’s the best game involving a service academy this week.  And if I were a legitimate prognosticator (which either means “guy who predicts games” or it has something to do with nostrils…either one) I would have picked that one.  But since it’s me, and I try not to take myself too seriously, I went with Southern Mississippi at Navy.  The Golden Eagles will sail into (see what I did there?) Navy-Marine Corps Stadium and will try to upend the future Big East member Midshipmen (oh yeah, by the way…great choice Big East.  I love Navy but seriously?  Navy is gonna provide legitimacy to your conference?  Come on…) and continue their winning ways.  They already scored one big road win over Carruthers and the boys at Virginia, and they could very well make it another one behind their high powered offense.  This could actually be a good game.  OUR PICK:  Navy

-Major Munnerlyn

ACC WEEKLY EGG TOSS PICKS WITH SISTER HAZEL!

(Click play…and start reading!)

This week, I am offering up a unique way to help bring the ACC weekly egg toss picks closer to home, with more emotion. I give you the best thing to come out of Gainesville other than Steve Spurrier and Muschamp's STARE OF DEATH… I give you SISTER HAZEL!

 “I miss you -I miss being overwhelmed by you. And I need rescue -I think I'm fading away. But I keep thinking that you'll wake me up with a whisper in my ear - I keep hoping that you'll sneak in my room…”

• I’m 110% positive that this has to do with the ACC’s lusting desires for Miami in 2005. Why else would you want Larry Coker and his 2001 National Title to come whisper in your ear while laying in bed? We all know that Virginia Tech isn’t going to get it done this year either…so look for this game to be miserable to watch. Nothing like 2 overhyped teams playing in a county with more meth labs per capita than any other in VA! Pick: VT

“So I wait and I wait…and I run old scenes through my tired head- Of the days we laid by the school and said forever…Was that the best I'll ever be?”

• See… here’s the part where everybody starts to question if FSU in 1999 and Miami in 2001 will be the best the ACC will ever be. I’d have to say with yes…that is the best you will be Championship wise. However...UNC and Louisville play this week, and I’ve got to say…The Cardinals are likely asking themselves the same question after winning the Orange Bowl in 2007. This game is a tough one, but I’ll have to give the nudge to UNC at home. BUT, TAKE THE POINTS AND LOUISVILLE! Pick: UNC

“I miss you. I miss talking all night long with you, and I need this to find a way to your home. My love can you hear me? Have I been hoping loud enough, wishing hard enough? Can you see me when I'm asleep all alone – alone?”

• OK…outside of being overtly creepy and stalkerish…this isn’t a bad question for John Swofford to be asking Bobby Bowden. Let’s be honest here for a second…Bobby Bowden was the ACC and was the main driving force in the conference for 2 decades. Close your eyes and imagine a grown ass man weeping into a phone saying “Bobby, come back! I need you!” Good thing for FSU, they play Wake Forest this weekend and they will not need any help beating the Daemon Deacons. Although, EJ Manuel is back for the Seminoles, so no more sleeping all alone on the sidelines! Pick: FSU

“So I wait and I wait, and I run myself in the same old circles. I sit and I stare, and I run old scenes through my tired head of the days that we laid by the school and said forever….Was that the best I'll ever be?”

• NC State fans, but I’m sorry. Your football team will never be anything, but you had the chance before your head coach told Russell Wilson that he couldn’t play 2 sports. Yea, that didn’t hurt you at all did it? I mean, it’s not like Wisconsin is good this year or anything…right? Speaking of running in the same old circles, do you think a directional Michigan school ever gets lost…or just “runs around in circles”? Either way, look for more of the same from those types of schools this week. Pick: NCSU

“Can't keep my hands from shaking….Stumbling through the wreckage again….But you're gone”

• Dude, I can’t think of a better analogy for Maryland than this. Remember, you beat Miami with some hellacious uniforms! Sadly, since you can’t throw, catch, or run the ball from you shaking so much because you got just a little bit of attention, you drop one at home to TEMPLE! I’m pretty sure that the Terps will be stumbling through the Georgia Tech Ramblin’ Wreckage again. (See what I did there?) Pick: Georgia Tech          

“So I wait and I wait, and I run myself in the same old circles. And I sit and I stare…And I run old scenes through my tired head. Of the days that we laid on our backs and said forever…Was that the best I'll ever be…Was that the best I'll ever be….Was that the best I'll ever be?”

• Everyone…unless you are reading via cell phone… close your eyes and think about this. Don’t you see Danny Ford and Dabo Swinney skipping down The Hill after rubbing Howard’s rock? All of a sudden, both of them lying on their backs talking about the alleged 1981 National Title while picking flowers and caressing each other’s face? Clemson fans have to be asking right about now if that was the best they will ever be. Quite frankly, they are going to fall ass backwards into an 8-9 win season…or greater if they don’t F it up. It kills me to say this, but I think Clemson destroys Boston College because they will never, ever, be the best at anything football related. If they lose, it’s only because Dabo is daydreaming about forever with Danny Ford. Pick: Clemson.

-Gamblin Boss

My Weekly Picks, “I’m A Certified Member of ShameCocks Anonymous” & Ramblings

First, let me begin by saying thank you to those of you who have hung in there and kept up with this blog when others haven’t. We all get busy, and this is just a forum for ideas…so you can’t really bitch about free things. We did come out of the gate hot, but jobs come first...but with that said I have a pretty open Friday, so here’s what has been on my mind for the past week or so:

#1 – The South Carolina Gamecocks…my pride and joy for every day of my 10,141.75 (that’s 365.25 days a year) days of existence…have become the most frustrating thing to watch since Obama getting elected. I’ve been there for 3-6-2 seasons. I was there for 1-10.I was there for when Clemson fans thought it was funny to throw “ZERO” candy bars on your porch after losing to them and going 0-11. Let’s really, really, really hope that this is only grooming my patience for when I have a little Gamblin’ Boss of my own to teach the right and wrongs of the world. If that is all I get out of it, then it’s going to be a plus. Otherwise I’m going to be dead by the age of 42 and fully gray by 35. Can we not get our shit together? (Speaking of shit…I’d like to present the reason behind my picture choice above. I would like to offer the analogy to you that South Carolina is competing in their first marathon. Winning the SEC East last year was a 10k challenge, so this year they are going all in. Many months have been spent training and practicing for this moment. Finally, they get close to the finish line and shit themselves. You can make the finish line whatever you like! Use your imagination!

 By far, we have the talent to play really good ball, but where is it? Has Spurrier’s pride and hard ass mentality of Garcia over the past years finally caught up to him? Is he accepting that the copious suspensions and public bashing/criticism can all be wiped away by a season where “we are here to coach Stephen and he will do the best that he can do”? Bullshit. You can’t tell someone for 3 years how horrible they are, how much better they need to play, .etc and all of a sudden say that you are fine. Oh yea, Lattimore ran for what, 17 times again Auburn? I give Chiznik a nod to coaching, although any idiot can beat SC. Stack the box with 8…then on 3^rd and long sit back and play cover 2 with a spy. It aint difficult! If we don’t beat Kentucky like a rented mule, I’m going to go ahead and hope I don’t have to travel for the bowl game…as the BBVA Compass Bowl is here in Birmingham! YAY MEDIOCRITY!

#2 – Paul Finebaum, and other sports talk radio – A funny thing happened to me on the way in to work today. WJOX here in the ‘ham was doing their daily rundown of SEC games for the upcoming week… LSU/UF, UT/UGA, UA/VANDY, MSU/UAB…on and on. They get to the end and say “well, I guess that’s about it. We can’t think of any other SEC game this week that we missed”. No mention of South Carolina. Not even a peep. I understand I’m living in a place where I’m going to catch shit, and I’m OK with that. Bammer fans are making fun of SC because we lost to a team that …remember…had to score twice in 2 minutes to beat Utah State. Also, we’re the team that lost at home to the team that let Clemson hang 600 yards of offense on them. Auburn fans? You have no idea what I get on the roads. Driving with a Gamecock logo and license plate frame on your car is a target for abuse. Going back to the talk radio angle, no one takes the SEC East or South Carolina seriously…and rightfully so. It’s painful to listen to any local talk here because it makes you realize that A – SC will never…EVER…be an elite team and B – SC will never, ever, get the respect it wants from fans west of Georgia.

#3 – Fantasy Football – I think I have turned a corner. Even after winning my league last year…I think I have lost the will to compete in fantasy football. What’s funny, I can’t put a finger on why.

Reasons why I love Fantasy Football: competitive, fun, easy, get to BS with other people in the league, make trades that involve risk, opportunity to win money

Reasons why I am burnt out on Fantasy Football: in a league where you have diehards and space fillers, lack of competitive talk, lack of people paying for the league, other things to do on a Sunday, lack of time to commit during the week

Again, I have no clue why this happened this year…but it did. Of the 3 leagues I am in, I just don’t care about it. I love football, and I love being around other people that love it as much as I do. Maybe I just surrounded myself with too many space fillers…or maybe I’ve become one to some extent.

#4 – COLD BEER. I love me a drink…but not in the “Holy shit I need a drink and it’s 3PM” but more of the “Man, there is nothing better than a cold draft beer and football on the big screen”. I don’t know what it is, but if you are either outside or watching sports…BEER TASTE DELICIOUS. Last Saturday we spent about 4 hours at Buffalo Wild Wings and I tell you what, those pitchers went down like water. Even when Carolina got beat I still enjoyed the taste. Now, I am a big Bourbon connoisseur…this much is true…but there are just times when beer blows dark liquor out of the water.

#5 - Facebook blows. I’m starting to take a page out of my fellow writer 63 Sports and turn my back away from it. When you think about it, Facebook could be like a giant star that is full of life…then continues to grow so large that it can no longer contain itself…and slowly collapses. I’m to the point in my life where I don’t feel the need to hop on a see what everyone else is doing constantly. More so, I don’t see the need to update my status or “LIKE” whatever someone else has posted. What’s even worse…checking in to a place that you should be…such as “HOME” or “at work”…AND CHECKING IN ANYWHERE IN GENERAL. This is becoming a way to humble brag about things to the 10000^th degree. Why should someone care if you are checking into the Biltmore Estate? What about if you check into the wrong tailgate spot? “Oh God! I did it again! It says I’m in the Fairgrounds but really I am at Carolina Walk!” Then of course, you could be that guy who checks into an airport…the biggest tool move of them all. Why? Because nothing says attention whore more than “I’m getting to travel but I’m not going to tell you where so you better ask, like, or comment on my status so other people could see it because I’m too goodie goodie and don’t want to brag about where I am going even though I should tell you because you are my friends, right?”.

#6 – The Yankees – THANK GOD THEY GOT BEAT. THAT IS ALL.

PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! PICKS! 

Here’s who I like this week:

Louisville +14 @ UNC

Oklahoma – 10.5 @ Texas

Pitt @Rutgers +7

Central Michigan @ NC State -10.5

Florida @ LSU – 13

Your Week 5 Championship Playoff Update!

(Come on people!!  Even something called Women's Professional Soccer has a playoff)

At the beginning of the season I outlined my plan for fixing college football.  Specifically, it was a plan to eliminate the really efficient awful BcS, and replace it with a National Championship playoff.  Using a playoff to settle a championship?  I KNOW, outside the box here I come!!

The teams listed below are listed with their seed next to them, and how they qualified for the tournament in parentheses after their write up.  Remember, the six "major" conferences (this includes you Big East) automatically get in.  Two spots are reserved for "lower tier" conference champs, and the final four spots are at large berths from any conference.  Also, the top four seeds get a first round bye and games in the first two rounds are played at the home stadium of the higher seed.  Without further ado I give you the first playoff preview for the 2011 College Football National Championship:

(1) Alabama- It's a deep conference, but I think the Tide will find a way to beat LSU in the regular season.  Let's be honest, that's really the SEC conference championship. (SEC Champs)
(2) Oklahoma-  This has turned out to be a surprisingly deep Big 12(ish).  This could change, with games still ahead vs Texas and Oklahoma State, but at this point OU appears to be the top dog. (Big 12-ish Champs)
(3)  LSU-  I don't care that they won't win their division.  I think this is the second best team in the best conference so they will scoop up one of the four at large bids to the tournament. (At-Large #1)
(4) Wisconsin-  I was not convinced they were that good.  They had a pretty soft non-conference schedule.  Aaaand then they beat the life out of Nebraska.  That win, gives them the extra edge for the #4 seed. (Big 10-ish Champs)
(5) Stanford-  Again, they are this close (hold your fingers close together) to getting the #4 seed and a bye.  Considering they have the best player in the nation on their team, this may not be where they finish. (Pac-12 Champs)
(6) Boise State-  They're legit.  Anyone who doesn't think so (I'm looking at you Ohio State President, Gordon Gee) hasn't watched this team play.  They're getting their top WO back this week too.  This may not be where they finish either. (Mountain West Champs, Lower Tier Conference At-Large #1)
(7) Michigan-  Ahhhh, doesn't everything seem better when Michigan is actually good?  After their three year sentence to purgatory RichRod land (coming soon to Oxford, MS!!!) Brady Hoke has the Wolverines contending again. (At-Large #2)
(8) The Other School in South Carolina-  Ugh.  Fine.  They're good.  That's all I'm saying. (ACC Champs)
(9) Oklahoma St.- Another situation where there could be a lot of teams slotted here.  I decided on the Cowboys, well, I think they are better than Kansas State, Texas,Texas A&M, Florida, or South Carolina.  This will sort itself out by the end of the year. (At Large #3)
(10) Georgia Tech-  As has been noted on here before, the Gamblin Boss and I love this offense.  Who would've thought the ACC would have two quality teams this year?  I sure as shit didn't. (At-Large #4)
(11) Rutgers-  This is why the term "major conferences" was in quotes at the beginning of this article.  All the teams I mentioned in Oklahoma State's write-up are better than this team.  Yes, even the Stephen Garcia-led Gamecocks.  Unfortunately, the Big East still has a seat at the big kid table, so they get an automatic bid. (Big East Champs)
(12)  SMU-  Boy this seems weird to type this.  It seems even weirder that as of last week the nation's leader in touchdowns was Zach Line, a running back from the June Jones/Run and Shoot offense.  (His offenses typically throw the ball like 623 times a game for those that don't know).  (C-USA Champs, Lower Tier Conference At-Large #2)

So Close:  Texas, Kansas State, Florida, South Carolina, Houston, Illinois, Louisiana Hyphen

That seems like a good start.  Certainly some of these teams could be swapped out, but it's important to remember this is week 5.  This will sort itself out...hopefully.  Email us at secbagmen@gmail.com with any suggestions.
-Major Munnerlyn

America’s Youth, Your Mother and I Are VERY Disappointed In You!!

We interrupt this (somewhat) regularly scheduled sports blog to bring you an important public service announcement.  Listen up youth of America or so help me, I will turn this car around RIGHT NOW!!  I have had enough.  I know that I am no longer supposed to understand what makes you tick.  Or what is acceptable and what is unacceptable but today I saw something that crossed the line.  It’s been enough to see skinny jeans everywhere.  I mean I never thought I would see the day that wearing jeans so tight, they pushed male genitals up to somewhere in the Greater Belly Button Region.  It was another thing to see a complete abandonment of quality Saturday morning cartoons.  Really?  We’re getting rid of “Eek the Cat,” “Animaniancs,” and “Bobby’s World,” so that we can flood the market with “Dragonball Z,” “Pokemon,” and something called “The Backyardigans?”  It’s worse even still that Lady Gaga and the entire Kardashian family are famous, and neither has any discernable talent.  (Editor’s Note:  Ray J would disagree with the notion that Kim Kardashian has no talent, but I’m not getting into that right now.  May we can talk about it when you are older).  No, no, I could take ALL of that, but today I have had enough.  I went in the hat store today to get a regular, soft, good fitting South Carolina hat.  After I sorted through the 9,000 hats that are terrible colors of their original versions (does anyone honestly need a neon green Atlanta Braves hat?) and the 612 major league baseball team hats (of which, America’s youth, you can probably only positively identify four teams) I saw something jump out at me.  There, like a bastion of oppression, was a black hat with a GIANT RED STAR AND A SICKLE AND HAMMER!!!  You know, this thing:

(Vladimir Lenin thanks you for your support.  Founder of the communist movement in the U.S.S.R.??  That’s what Russia used to be called.  Oh for god’s sake just go look it up already.)

Really?  We’re goin with communist symbols on our hats now?  Why?  Give me one good reason why.  You can’t can you?  Nope, didn’t think you could.  You know what, fine, just go get the fire engine red Yankees hat with the furry ear flaps on it.  Jesus, at least you know what the “interlocking N-Y” on the front of the hat stands for.  If I see you wearing this hat, I have only one way to respond to you:

Now, go to your room.

-Major Munnerlyn